My Sinisterhand

There is always a point in time, I believe, where each one of us has a choice to make about truth. An infamous man once asked the Author of Truth, “What is truth?” To many times I feel we sacrifice the truth for what is convenient for us. We live relativistically in a world of absolutes. In doing so we try to justify each of our actions and motives against some preconceived idea that we are right and that others are wrong. In fact, what we have done is believed a lie which often times is far more complex than the simple truth. To say that there are no absolutes is a contradiction in itself, because in saying that, an absolute has been stated. An internal contradiction has been created and holds no ground. Living with relative truth means that there are no “wrongs” and there are no “rights”, only what makes sense at the time. All pursuits for “fairness” would cease. Racism, sexism, discrimination, would be meaningless. To put it bluntly, no one would have the right to claim that they are right because there would be no moral basis for what is right.

The moral foundation on which one stands is dependent upon some belief, a belief that that person holds to be true. This foundation is a source of hope and faith that each one of us has for our day to day lives. Lives that we live mostly, in a nonchalant-take-it-for-granted type of life. Relativism is a dead end. There is no hope for anyone in a relativistic society. We would all become sociopaths doing what each one of us claims to be right. In the end chaos would ensue, unless we stood together and determined that we are going to have a foundation of absolute truth.

Is your foundation of truth relative or is it firmly fixed in place as an absolute truth that withstands all time? Is your truth hard to grasp and understand or is it a straight fact plainly evident in the world? Does you truth demand that “right” be “right” and “wrong” be “wrong” regardless of who or what is at stake? Are you capable of bearing the burden of truth and living a life founded on it? Are you prepared to give everything for your truth even your life if it were demanded? Where is your truth found?

“I am the Way, the Truth and the Life…” -Jesus

Mom and Dad got elfed!

We have a new puppy in our family. His is a Boxer named Micah. He is a wonderful dog and is very playful. Hershey and Maggie are getting used to him still. Hershey ignores him most of the time and Maggie plays with him a bit. He will be rather large, approximately 90 pounds. I cannot wait till he is big enough to go running with. He is still a puppy though and does puppy things, i.e. chewing shoes and other things lying around. We have had him for about 2 months now and he is growing fast. He is a joyful addition to our family

I have given much thought to my place here in this life and what it is I hope to accomplish in the expanse of time I have been given. I have seen so much in my life of almost 32 years. My thoughts swarm with ideas and experiences alike. I am captivated by those around me and their lives as well. I am in awe of this planet we live on and how small we are in all of the cosmos. I cannot begin to understand all that there is out beyond our existence without humbly realizing that it was Him who gave us Life. It is always a thrill to discover knew things or ideas. I believe it is even more thrilling to rediscover something or someone as if it were the first time. I find my self rediscovering things all the time and I am thankful for the second chance to experience it all over again.

This Christmas, Maria and I will be together and for this I am extremely grateful. Since I have returned from Iraq in October, we have had an excellent time together. From her year long departure to Nuclear Medicine School and my deployments and other various travels. We are excited about this Christmas with each other and our friends. I am making two turkeys and some good ol’ spiced cider with rum. It will be an excellent festive holiday time.

I hope everyone i doing well in all your endeavors. I am blessed to know you all and cherish our memories. I hope to see some of you sooner or later, hopefully sooner. Merry Christmas!

-Jason

Its fall and the Harvest Moon has past. Soon the Hunter’s Moon will rise. The leaves are turning and the wind is milder. All will sleep soon to be born again next year.

“Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.”  - Isaiah 43:1

Meaninglessness does not come from being weary of pain. Meaninglessness comes from being weary of pleasure.

-G. K. Chesterton

A couple of nights ago, Maria and I watched a special on the National Geographic Channel about gangs, specifically MS-13. It was very disturbing and saddening to see so many people disillusioned by the false hopes of respect, family and love in such a disturbing group.

Last week, I had the chance to talk to a few kids that my brother teaches. These kids have been in and out of juvenile detention and jail and some are involved with nationwide gangs. I spoke about life, responsibility, honor and commitment to these kids, who are between the age of 13 and 15. I told them of my life and how the Army has given me the chance challenge myself beyond my wildest dreams. I wasn’t speaking as a recruiter or a spokesman for the Army. I was telling them to not just settle with something because life throws them a curve. One kid sort of challenged my life saying that he could get all of what I got from being in a gang. I began to explain the difference from a gang and the Army and that it was a fundamental difference that I believe he chooses not to see. The difference is that in the end, gangs are about oppression. Those in power try to lead their followers down a path of destruction all for their benefit with the hopes of living a legacy that will be remembered. Unfortunately, I believe the kid has been brainwashed not just by the gang, but by pop culture and the materialistic world around him. In the end, I think he understood me and I hope that i have made him begin to think and question the assumptions he has believed so naively.

Later that night, I felt very sad for the world and the pain that is in it, all caused by our belief in ourself and ourself centered life. All too often we think that this life is about ourselves and if it doesn’t involve me directly, then it isn’t my concern. Selfishness is how we got here and selfishness is why we stay here.  However, I shouldn’t be so critical of my fellow man without including myself.  I too am as guilty as the next of putting my self and my wants and needs first.  So, where do we go from here?  Do we continue to wallow in our misery or do we claim that there is a better life for us from One who freely gave it at His own expense?  The pain will continue and there will still be sadness, yet at the end of the day we can know that there is One who understands because He too went through all that we go through.  We can come boldly to the place of ultimate sacrifice and lay everything we have ever done there and offer ourselves for His plan and His will.  It will be a more fulfilling life.  It has to be better than this.
-Jason

I’m not dead, just reluctant to write at the moment. I don’t know why, but I will again soon. I’ve got so many thoughts for my Alone saga, that I can’t formulate a ‘next’ for it just yet. However, I have been doing some good reading anyway. Currently on my desk are five books: Black Hawk Down; Guns, Germs and Steel; Hard to Believe; Taking the Constitution Seriously; We Were Soldiers, Once and Young. Maria has been encouraging me to finish my story. She has bought me a few books to push me forward. I am so thankful for her and her encouragement.

On that note, we are together again. I am currently in El Paso, Texas visiting her and enrolled in an Army school. I will be here till the end of March, then back out to our home in North Carolina. She will be here till August finishing up her Nuclear Medicine studies. So, all is well.

-Jason

There was a young man who said God,
Must find it exceedingly odd
When he finds that the tree
Continues to be
When noone’s about in the Quad.

Dear Sir, your astonishment’s odd
I’m always about in the Quad
And that’s why the tree
Continues to be
Since observed by, yours faithfully, God.

-George Berkeley